Giant drink cups.
They give you thirteen pounds of Coke in a cup that would make even Godzilla think twice about his drive home for an extra 28 cents. But ask them for ketchup and they begrudgingly give you one measly packet for your thirteen pound sack of fries. What, is ketchup made out platinum? The drink cups just keep gettting bigger and bigger... I dont think anyone needs that much Mister Pibb? I cant drink a cup of soda that a herd of bison can fight in! When I ask for a large I expect 24 ounces, but instead I get a 50 year old teamster driving a propane powered Heidelburg forklift asking me to lower the talegate on my truck. Where the hell am I supposed to put a 55 gallon drum of Moutain Dew? Soon they'll just pump it into the bed of my pickup from one of those water tanks they used to fill up locomotives on Petty Coat Junction.
What the hell happened to small and medium drink sizes? Now they start with what used to be large, which is the new small and made medium the size of an industial cement mixer. I can't even think of something to compare the extra large "bladder punisher" that I got today. Rhoade Island? When I look for my next truck I'm not going to look for passenger side airbags, anti-lock brakes, or safety crumple zones. I'm going to look for the one with a gigantic ass drink holder, no passenger seat just one giant cup holder. But then, how in hell am I going to get it IN the truck? They'll need bigger doors or a hatch on the roof....they wont think of that though.
They're just going to have to make cars bigger to accomodate these huge cups.
How about the Chrysler Leviathan, or the Ford Omnibus? Introducing the new Mazda Juggernaut, The Chevy Caravan SHOULD be as big as one.
I think we need congress to step in on this, anyone know the number to New Mexico or where ever the hell they are this week?
So I go to McDonalds on the way home from work and order a burger and fries and they give me this Godzilla drink with both hands like a little kid. I remember to ask for ketchup.
They forgot the straw.