Why me????? "When I catch that gypsy theres gonna be four little hooves hanging between his legs because im gonna shove a moose so far up his ass he's gonna look like a coat rack!!!
The man began to root through his car for his portable moose detection device. It could find a moose in heat 500 miles away. It was even equipped with a satellite navigation system to make
sure you could get to the moose it was detecting. "What the hell?" Hubert thought. The equipment indicated that the nearest moose was flying through the air at the moment. Must be on the fritz.
The moment that Hubert was thinking this a Moose gliding along in the space shuttle had just reached a low orbit over Idaho. Suddenly it sneezed inside it's space helmet. Blinded by moose snot it started to panic. The astronauts' worst case scenario became an actuality as the Moose ran amock in the spacecraft and accidentally hit the automatic "Land On The Moon" button with his butt.
"Well", thought Hubert, "I guess I'm going to have to find another Moose somewhere."
He began to search for a closer one when the sensors picked up a reading not faraway. It turned out to be a restaraunt around the corner that specialized in Moose ass flambe.
"Well I hope it's fresh or else this aint gonna work at all, I'm kinda hungry too."
So he started off, wondering why he jumped out of his car in the first place.
"Oh yeah, it was because I had a goddam stink-bug crawling up my pants, and I didn't want to smell like stink bugs for my big date with Ethel Mae. The thought of her reminded him of why he got that gypsy curse....