HA HA HA HA HA HA HUHHMMMMMMMMmmmmmmm. Those are so hysterically funny I laugh myself into an epileptic fit EVERY TIME I SEE ONE.

They're about as funny as my dentist telling me he has to do a quadruple root canal in my mouth but he has to go in through my ass to do it. So witty those stickers. "HORN BROKEN, WATCH FOR FINGER." Oh I tell you what. I've ruptured many a pancreas and about thirty-six ribs laughing over those. Ah, someone's ingenious humor, wasted on a bumper. Actually they were funny once, in nineteen eighty-one for instance.

Something else you should know. Diet coke would taste better if it was passed through the digestive tract of a cat first. Diet coke with lemon tastes like lemony pledge furniture polish. Diet coke with lime ... tastes muy muy fant�stico! This stuff is the shizafied shiznit! I'm sure I shall tire of it soon and start to think it tastes like ass in a baggy...... Whatever the hell that means. Sometimes the part of my brain that makes descriptive sentences doesn't make much sense. I'm not sure if it's located in the frontal lobe. I think I use my backal lobe a bit more actually.

Oh, a question for the women out there, which is about ninety percent of you I think. What do you call those pants that are in fashion in the spring time? The ones that are kind of baggy and come down to your knees, tie with a shoe-string on the side.

Yea ...... those look stupid. What, do you think you're pirates? I know, I'm a man, what do I know about fashion. I do know that those are the silliest things I've ever seen. They fall right in line behind the biggest pair of high heeled shoes, the ones with an ACME brick for the heel, for things I think look horrid. Of course what do I know, I don't work for Vogue. This is to your advantage of course.

And lastly, to tyleross about the carnivorous bran muffins. They are called Domo kuns..I think. Heres a link to a shit ton of them that will get you started . As far as why my banner link has them in it, well, my banners aren't supposed to make sense or refer to my diary, at all. They're just eye catchers. Heres the latest banners I've made though.

Talking muffins, woo doggie! RAWR!

Yea you wonder where this all comes from. The little voices tell me to say it of course.

This one is for all you people on the Atkins roller coaster. Sorry, no sugar for you.

(Editors note: This entry had been posted and re-posted eleventy billion times due to spelling errors, links that don't link and various assorted other anal things I thought didn't work. I'll most likely be back in 43 seconds to fix something else. Watch this space.)