Just things I've written down through the years.....
Things I've learned and written down over the years.

History of the world 5,000,000 -present

After the earth cooled it formed an extremely fertile crescent, containing primitive people such as the Hittites, who believed in just about the stupidest things you ever heard of. Then came Greece and Rome, followed closely by Asia. All of this came to halt during the middle ages, which were caused by the Jutes. Next the Turks got way the hell over into France, after which there were towns. And the Magna Cart. Then France and England fought many wars that involved dates such as 1739 and settled by the treaty of Ultrecht, which was used to harness water power. But the seeds were sown for several world wars and the Louisiana purchase, but fortunately we now have a peaceful atom.-Dave barry

" All things being equal, the simplest explanation tends to be the right one." - William of Ockham (Occam's razor)

We're all in the Hindenburgh of life, there's no point in fighting over the window seat.

90% of all guys masturbate. The other 10% have no arms. 60% of all women masturbate. The other 40% expect you to think it takes that long to take a bath.

"Damnit! He stabbed me with a damned corn dog stick Virgil!" -Dwight Yoakum "Painted hero" ( he played a rodeo clown)

The difference between a new girlfriend and Charles Manson is that he has the common decency to to LOOK LIKE A NUT WHEN YOU FIRST MEET HIM! "My god he's ordering from the children's menu and just ordered a child! Why is he buttering the back of his chair?"

People out on their first date together are NEVER who they really are. They're trying to impress the other without driving them off. When the Hostess calls out to the couple when the table is available, she SHOULD say "Imposters, party of two? Imposters party of two?"

Men and women are full of crap, thats why I don't hang out with those assholes.

My love life has gone from the sweet milky thing called love, and turned into the stinky curdled provolone of hell.

"Give me a small pot to drink.

Give me big pot to drink.

I will drink everything, I will drink it dry.

I came to see my kin, so give me something to drink." -Drinking song from the Ararra indians.

I have your photograph, but thats not a good enough substitute. You can't hug a photograph.

Something I got on my answering machine from a friend once:

"This is Bill at Charlie Hillard Ford. uh just letting you know that your loan for the Oscar Mier wiener mobile was denied. I think I can probably get you into a lesser model though. It doesn't have any mustard or a bun.....it's just a piece of bread and some custom wheels.....call me back at............."

Chance favors the prepared mind.

Everything is on it's way to somewhere.

It's a sad beautiful world. (Yes I'm watching it now.)


Sunday, Apr. 25, 2004 7:09 P.M.



on the itunes: "down by the water"......PJ Harvey

| 3 old comments

old gripes|griping now|new gripes

This diary is lame. - Wednesday, Feb. 25, 2009
woah - Thursday, Feb. 05, 2009
operation kindness - Thursday, Apr. 20, 2006
more belligerent bees on dogs - Monday, Feb. 20, 2006
teste-moanial - Thursday, Feb. 16, 2006




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