See I told you I saw a coyote, and I wasn't smokin' chewin' or cookin' with peyote that day! I swear that coyote had a giant rocket jet he was getting ready to fly into the wall of a building with too.

You doubted me?

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Shrinking habitat forces coyotes into Plano neighborhoods

01:16 PM CST on Thursday, January 29, 2004

By STEVE STOLER / WFAA-TV

Plano's surprising presence of coyotes is the result of explosive growth in Collin County, according to Plano animal control officials.

The coyotes' natural habitat is slowly shrinking, forcing them into residential neighborhoods like Pearl Court and Preston Ridge Trail on a regular basis.

The call came into Plano Animal Services just after 9 a.m. Wednesday that two coyotes had been spotted along the Preston Ridge bike trail. News 8 crews found them in the middle of a neighborhood - a pair of coyotes that seemed unfazed by nearby humans.

Plano Animal Services reports increases in the number of coyote sightings. In the last two months, nine coyotes have been humanely trapped and relocated.

That's not much of a comfort to Janet Recker, whose 12-year-old Yorkshire Terrier was killed by a coyote.

"I couldn't find him when I walked over to the other side (of the creek), but I saw a coyote ... standing there looking at me," Recker said. "I thought, 'I can't find my dog, but there's a coyote - this is big-time trouble.'"

Jane Hutzler's close encounter with a coyote came as she walked her schnauzer.

"Something made me turn around," Hutzler said. "I turned around and looked, and a coyote was right behind us and had been following us - I don't know how long.............."

It goes on and on about how the coyotes are a bit of a problem and about how their main food supplement is road-runners, (which by the way are HUGE birds if you've never seen one up close), small dogs, cats, birds, chinese food delivery people, phone books, mopeds, and brontosaurus burgers.

Other than having a good chance of seeing a coyote in the local mall food court, you're also likely to see them packing giant springs with a boxing glove at the end into a box marked "berdseed", buying jet propelled skates at Target, or building some contraption for launching a Saturn rocket. Other times they can be observed to have heads that resemble burnt matchsticks after one of their schemes has been miscalculated somehow.

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In other news, I diagnosed myself with restless leg syndrome today.

I have tried to describe what this feels like to other people, but they look at me like I have a foot for a head. It usually happens when I'm trying to go to sleep or if I take the recommended dose of sleeping pills. I have to take one or half of one and then go RIGHT TO BED and try to fall asleep before I start to get all jittery in my right leg. Fuck is it annoying!

The cats all:

"What the fuck are you doing man? Stop shaking your leg like that!"

"Pipe down or I'm shipping your ass off to Ho Cha Chu's chinese restaurant."

It feels like I have something moving around behind my kneecaps and it tickles HORRENDOUSLY.

This is not to be confused with dancin' feet or boogie fever by the way. This is in no way a groovy way to go to sleep.

Do you have Restless Legs Syndrome?

1. When sitting or lying down, do you have a strong feeling or urge to move your legs that may become irresistible?

2. Is this sensation to move your legs associated with unpleasant or creepy crawly sensations deep in your legs?

3. Do the sensations and urge to move come on during periods of rest or inactivity?

4. Are these symptoms reduced or relieved by voluntary movement of your legs?

5. Do the sensations and urge to move bother you more in the evening and at night rather than during the day, especially when you lie down?

6. Do you often have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep?

7. Does your bed-partner tell you that you jerk your legs when you are asleep; do you sometimes have involuntary leg jerks when you are awake?

8. Are you frequently tired or unable to concentrate during the day?

9. Do you have family members who experience those same urge to move and unpleasant sensations?

10. Have medical tests not revealed a cause for your urge to move and unpleasant sensations?

If you do have restless legs syndrome (RLS), you are not alone. Up to 8% of the U.S. population may have this neurologic condition. Many people have a mild form of the disorder, but RLS severely affects the lives of millions of individuals.